Gentle_Alouette (gentle_alouette) wrote in okcupid,
Gentle_Alouette
gentle_alouette
okcupid

Help, please?

So I made a profile on this site almost a year ago, and when asked for a physical description, I put "curvy". Thing is, I didn't lie. Back then, I'd lost a lot of weight and had really slimmed down. Shortly after that my sister became very ill and eventually passed away, I nearly flunked school, got really depressed, and gained a ton of weight! Needless to say, I'm not "curvy" anymore. I'm nowhere near it. Anyway, I've been pretty much skimming through and deleting the messages I've received all year when one really caught my attention and I ended up responding on whim. To say we clicked is an understatement. I swear I've never felt so attached to anyone before so quickly (two weeks of non-stop conversations). We've exchanged numbers and chatted on facebook (I made sure he's legit, lol) and now he's coming to my town in a week and wants to meet (in a group setting, so I'd be more comfortable)! And he probably doesn't suspect anything because all the pictures on the profile/my facebook are mine/recent. I just happen to be photogenic and know how to angle a camera well. I don't photoshop myself, but I only post pictures of myself from the waist up, and like I said, angled really well. He obviously knows I'm not skinny, but he doesn't know that I'm not as small as my facebook pictures make me out to be. At all.

I know I have to be honest, but I'm frightened. I really, really like this guy. We have so many things in common, and even the things we don't have are amazing. We talk about all kinds of things, and every conversation, either on the phone or via text, is fascinating. He's also really charming and adorable and smart. I've never gone further with anyone past the first date, and I'm really frightened to lose this-- this leading up to something because I have a feeling that it could be really great. 

I know I have to come clean. Because he lived far from me, I though it would be safe to flirt for a while, while losing weight (which I already have been, slowly). This is way too sudden, though. And I suppose I can reject his offer to meet, but then what? He made it clear that he liked me a lot and wanted to see where this leads. I'm pretty sure that if I refuse to see him for the month he'll be in town, he's probably going to lose interest. Especially as he won't be back for another 4-5 months or so after that. And who could blame him? 

Advice and suggestions on how to handle this situation would be greatly appreciated.

Tags: dating, lie liar deceipt online offline, questions
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